Coping Fortress

The name of the Lord is a strong fortress; the godly run to him and are safe.

Proverbs 18:10 NLT

At first I'm thinking, Godly? I am considered godly? Sip some coffee, I read and think. I read this wrong again. I keep reading it as the Lord is a strong fortress and not the name of the Lord. Run to Him and be safe. The name and run. I find, I'm in a day and era of acknowledgement and humility. i can acknowledge anyone on facebook, tag them, get notifications. When it comes to God, I fear. He's my strong fortress. I don't run to him until later at times. But why? Because I don't want to get hurt again, and usually running to Him, means pain and growth. I want this life to be easy. I think of all the bible stories out there and 90% were in fear. God kept saying "do not fear". I keep on thinking "strong fortress" but fail to see it's his name. I make my own fortress and it's pretty week. You won't hear "the name" on the news, they can't say it. Yet it's the person's name I credit. He touches the heart and freaks me out. My heart has been hardened, it's been broken, I have only one. Whenever i humble myself and credit God, I am opening my broken and wounded heart. That hurts. My coping nature isn't to run to him and be safe.

Hits me, with the name of God come's the strong fortress. Yet I attempt to build my own. I can't do it without Him.