At first I'm thinking that I wear my heart on my sleeve. It's crazy but I do. I put everything out there. Why? because I want to be real. Doing this also puts it up for battle and shred. People will see I'm doing this and want to take advantage of me. They won't be respectful, they just will be completely mean. You throw enough of that at me, I end up hardening my heart. In school, I lost trust in teachers and my classmates. I averaged. I see it many people, so much, that I empthaze with them, because I feel the heart is where life begins and ends. Business's are started due to whats on someones heart.
Sip some coffee, I read and think. In Video production, I produce for the viewers hearts. What mood do I want to give them. People watch videos to escape, learn, grow, be impacted, out of interest, laugh.
My tough part is when my heart is hurt by people that I'm close to, this started with my family, and then gets into my marriage. I didn't expect that, I didn't expect that I would take the pain of childhood into my adult life. I thought adult life would just erase them. Now I find I'm living according to them at times.
Hits me, I need to guard my heart in weird moments, do not mistake kindness for weakness. My heart may be hurt, but it does determine the course of my life. I feel while scrolling through facebook, so many hurt people are escaping to it. Other's escape from it. Facebook was founded due to a hardened heart. Now here I am, online sharing my heart, lol.