the Face of Video

For God, who said, "Let there be light in the darkness," has made this light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ.

2 Corinthians 4:6 NLT

At first I'm thinking, it's another light verse, and I haven't had my coffee yet. I'm tired this morning, well, I'm always tired. Got my coffee.

Sip some coffee, I read and think. This is pretty strong, not the coffee, but the verse. I'm reminded of how I light a video shoot. It's really critical of how I do it.  I do it all on location and it gets everyones attention. People start taking pictures, they ask me how I got into this. I have to move things around in a room and make a whole environment. I have to change theirs. I have to explain where I want them to sit or stand, I also have questions to ask. Whats my point with this verse? Christ wants my heart, in video, I want their heart, in order to get that, I have create a new environment that they may have forgotten about, I have to give them a new face, a new light. I have to ask them questions that are going to make them think about their companies in a way they haven't before. I do this, so I can piece their business together, so that people on the web will know what they do. How many times have I been lost in my own sinful ways? I haven't forgotten about God, but His light is really dim,  I'm trying to keep up with other things and not Him. He's my new environment, He's the 3 point light kit that makes me pop out in a scene so people can hear what my business or my life is all about. It's crazy when I have to ask people in a company if I can redo their entire area in order to get the right shot. They say, sure! Why can't I let God do that to me? I'm amazed of how many people he's put into my life, to give me this new face He wants me to have. It's a face of no fear, it's a face of confidence, a face of honesty and integrity, it's a new look, that at times I don't believe is possible to have.

Hits me, everyday there's a new opportunity for a new face of video. It's wherever I go, whatever I do. I'm going to mess up things and feel stupid. It doesn't matter though,  Christ will shine through in His own way, not mine. People will impact me in a way they never thought, and I'll do the same without knowing it.

God's timing, not ours

For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved.

Romans 10:10 NLT

At first I'm thinking, I've read this before. It's interesting how I have to say things with my mouth, its the way I say them. Sip some coffee,  I read and think. I see believing and confessing with your mouth. God doesn't want fake people. I'm not fake, I don't think anybody else is either. We all have reasons why we are the way we are. Facebook has all kind of tests to take about what movie character you, disney character, hippie, all kinds of stuff. Their stupid, yet genius, its how they sell you stuff. In networking events I've been to, people have seen my energy and excitement for life and would seduce me to their mlm businesses. I've learned my lesson and can now simply walk away. But its interesting because I don't put up any real walls. Why put up walls, when were all in this life together. I read and think.

It's interesting how I can't pray on someones behalf for them to be saved, they have to do it. I can't believe on someones behalf either, they have to do it. It's like my mom taking a test for me in high school so I would pass, it doesn't work like that. I'm amazed of how God did not give us the ability to fix people, but things. How many times did I watch some kid be brought to the pastor in order to get fixed, or even to me? How many times were youth pastors blamed for the kids problems. Churches don't call people to attend, people attend. The arenas don't call people to remind them of a game, people go to see their team.

Hits me, its all God's timing, not mine. I learn differently than others, my daughter was hanging upside down on the ottoman that other day, and I accused her of not listening. Then I thought to myself, maybe that's her way of listening.  Now how do i title this?

School of hard knocks

So Christ has truly set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don't get tied up again in slavery to the law.

Galatians 5:1 NLT

The first thing I think of how I don't do this right. I don't stay free, and I get tied up again in the law. It also reminds me of the many times, men have preached to me saying this very thing. I put my act on and leave. Sip some coffee, I read and think. How many times, have told my wife I'm working on freedom. I find the bible filled with drama and death, not peace and happiness. I was hanging out last week with an old friend and mentioned that the cross wasn't an award ceremony of well done. It was death that brought freedom. I think about things too much, I think. I look at facebook and want to know what REALLY is going on, before people escape to there phone for a second to check it. Being above reproach these days is a challenge. I'm not elder material, I'm real material. I tell life like it is, I don't sugar coat it, with a bible verse of how I'm supposed to be. "make sure" stands out. I don't learn in the classroom. I learn on the job, from the school of hard knocks. I was looking to shoot a seminar last week and was asked how I was going to learn if I was behind the camera.  I told the presenter that, unless I'm listening to the presenter I cannot follow him with the camera. He then got someone else to shoot it. I still showed up but could only handle an hour of lecture. Even at church I can't handle too much teaching, I don't like teachers, too controlling. I do better with a phrase and think.  I find I'm trying to follow there and lose track of the message. When I stride to let Jesus live in me, and live above reproach, I begin judging people.  So what is the way out of all this?

Hits me, Christ as truly set me free, that freedom doesn't come from anywhere but Christ. I can escape to anything and Christ will be there waiting. I can disagree with scripture but that doesn't make it false, it makes me stupid. Any lecturer can do their thing, but it's Christ's life in me that will see me through everything.

Frozen

If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.

Jeremiah 29:13 NLT

At first, I'm thinking this makes sense in all areas. If I research anything wholeheartedly, I will find what I'm looking for. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I don't look for God enough. It's an emotional, spiritual thing to study God. Years ago I used to study Him all the time, but then it whithered away. "You will find me" sticks out. Then I'm reminded of Forrest Gump "i didn't know,  I was looking for Him". I find I'm like Elsa in Frozen "no escape from the storm inside me". Or is it a storm? I find that I'm captive in my daily sins. I'm amazed of how I become a immune to living in the storm instead of finding my way out of it. It was Elsa's fear that kept her talent a storm. What is my fear of seeking God? That I'll struggle even more once I start growing in Him.  All Elsa had to do was love her sister and she would gain control of her gift. I find I have a battle with my gift, but I feel God telling me to trust Him with it. Why is that so hard? God doesn't do things by accident. There are no accidents. I read and think.

Hits me, Elsa had frozen her whole town out of fear of the past. It took her sister risking her life for her to let go of that fear. I can live in fear all of my life of rejection and failure and sure God will use me, but as soon as I wholeheartedly look for Him instead of hardheartedly, only then will I see my full potential excel. Or I will just end up freezing everything in my own way.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109830/

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2294629/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

For the First Time in Forever

Joyful are those who listen to me, watching for me daily at my gates, waiting for me outside my home!

Proverbs 8:34 NLT

On Vacation this week. Finally get a chance to blog some more in the morning. The first thing that comes to mind are these get rich quick schemes that I used to help produce when I was at PSAV. The doors would open in the ballroom and people would run to the front row to get a good seat. I was amazed of how much energy people had to make money. It was like they were kids. But when I've found the answer to things in my life, what am I to do? Coffee for instance, I make it every morning. It's the answer to me waking up from the dead. I rely on it. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I'm reminded of the song For the first time in forever from Frozen (that's a lot of f's).

http://www.amazon.com/Frozen-Two-Disc-Blu-ray-Digital-Copy/dp/B00G5G7K7O

How eager Anna was to get out of those walls. How anxious have I been in my personal life to seek God? not much. I seek Him on a daily basis. I don't listen to God enough either, but I'm joyful when I do.

Her parents had closed the gates, to protect them from humiliation and keep there gifts sacred. It was all based on fear. How many times have I been afraid to trust God? I'm amazed how He shows himself through my fear. It's almost like a hint that I can trust Him? Anna was alive and her love for Elsa wouldn't leave, so much so that she put her own life up at the end to protect her. Has my love for God ever left? no, but its dithered at times. I used to keep all the doors and windows shut, out of fear that people would see my gear and steal it. I read and think.

Hits me, For the first time in forever, is a daily revelation, it's a whole new day to reveal gifts and talents. It's to listen and seek to understand.

do not mistake kindness for weakness

One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.

Psalm 27:4

The first thing that I think of is the line from Gladiator - Maximus: [removes helmet and turns around to face Commodus] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

http://www.amazon.com/Gladiator-Blu-ray-Russell-Crowe/dp/B00AEFY552/ref=sr_1_3?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1402849643&sr=1-3&keywords=Gladiator

I've already had my coffee, so I am reading and thinking. Today is father's day 2014. I find myself always working up to the day about how much of a father I haven't been to my daughter, sure on facebook it looks right, but how selfish have I been this year with work. How godly haven't I been at home. As I read Maximus line in Gladiator, I don't know what I'd do without my family. Would I ask God and strive to dwell in his house all the days of my life? or would I want seek vengeance?  I was raised to see them as God's and not mine, so that death would be easy. I can't think that way, it just doesn't seem human. I title this blog "do not mistake kindness for weakness" because that's how I am read a lot. I am an easy going nice guy. I have to tell cold callers that "I will waist their time for 30 minutes being nice and not buy a think, so hang up now." When people want to do business with me, they usually give me this stone cold business look and I am trying to get to know them as a person. I read and think. Where was Maximus' temple? It was his vengeance, it was like, all he had was his strength and training. I thought about hitting church today, but I just don't like the sermon atmosphere, I will be waiting to leave. Then why go? It was how I was raised. I find I get more out of God when I'm blogging. God knows where I'm at everyday, regardless of where physically I'm at. He put people in my life to keep me on track. Maximus was a commander, but longed to be with his family. His wife and child made him who he was. Then he sought justice for them. He was only wanting one thing. God has designed me for one thing, to dwell in his presence, nothing else. Oh, I will get distracted and dwell elsewhere and he knows that. But no matter how far I drift way, I'm still longing for Him. He doesn't read my kindness as weakness, he reads it as opportunity.

Making eye contact with Christ

Exodus 20

New International Version (NIV)

The Ten Commandments

20 And God spoke all these words:

² “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.

³ “You shall have no other gods before^[a] me.

⁴ “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. ⁵ You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, ⁶ but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.

⁷ “You shall not misuse the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses his name.

⁸ “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. ⁹ Six days you shall labor and do all your work, ¹⁰ but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns. ¹¹ For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy.

¹² “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

¹³ “You shall not murder.

¹⁴ “You shall not commit adultery.

¹⁵ “You shall not steal.

¹⁶ “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.

¹⁷ “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.”

The 10 commandments have been on my mind for a few weeks now. I didn't know why either, probably because I've broken most of them. I began to ask myself why and what was going on between moses and God. Sip some coffee, I read and think.  

 I've been working on this entry for a while so the coffee kind of comes and goes.

I've come to recognize that this meeting between between God and Moses wasn't a coffee house conversation like, "lets narrow down a list of things that the people shouldn't do and try to keep it to 10".  God engraved these stones with lightning. So this is for real. It also hit me that, that they weren't just commandments, but God saying "i understand what you are struggling with, and know you will continue to battle these 10 things".


² “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.: 
He knew that a lot of times I think I should just get a job and forget this self employment thing. I want to blame people. He completely acknowledges and take responsibility for this.

³ “You shall have no other gods before^[a] me.
He knew I would replace him with other people and things.

⁴ “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below.
He knew my coping ways wouldn't be drawing to him, but to other things, he knew I would ignore his calling at times.

⁵ You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, ⁶ but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.
 He knew, I would be addicted to things due to my upbringing, and would need to keep knocking on my door to show me what I need to do and that He loved me.

⁷ “You shall not misuse the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses his name.
I'm careful about this one, but swearing and cursing, I've become really good at. Yet when I become ashamed and neglect to acknowledge him, I feel the conviction.

⁸ “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. ⁹ Six days you shall labor and do all your work, ¹⁰ but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns. ¹¹ For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy.

He knew I would be a workaholic and neglect to take a day of rest. He knew I would always be thinking about getting work in and getting it out. He knew the passion he gave me would get out of hand.  He also knew I would eventually get upset with the concept of a building, pulpet, and how corporate church has become. So much as to be tired of it. Yet he clear states, take a day off!

¹² “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Lol, because he knew I would rebel and not listen to them. 


¹⁴ “You shall not commit adultery.
He knew this would be a problem.


 ¹³ “You shall not murder.
i've never thought like this, but he knows its possible and its happened to others.

¹⁵ “You shall not steal.
 He knew I would steal and brag and laugh about it. (online stuff)

 ¹⁶ “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.
He knew I would get upset with neighbors at times.

¹⁷ “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.”

He knew this was an issue too. He knew that things find there way in to my mind in different formats because of situation upon situation of life that happens.

Hits me,
I wish he said, don't read peoples thoughts, don't fly, don't be embarrassing. He wasn't messing around. He wants me to be addicted to Him, but understands that it will be challenging. He's really just said "i know you guys, and here are ten ways to grow in me.
 
  

I desire mercy, not sacrifice - Jesus

Matthew 9:9-13

As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s booth. “Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him.  While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples.  When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?”  On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

 

 

At first I'm thinking, wow this is how he meets Matthew. As I read further, I find he comes back with what is the age old problem, defining the healthy and the sick. Sip some coffee, I read and think. "I desire mercy, not sacrifice" sticks out. What is sacrifice? the act of giving up something that you want to keep especially in order to get or do something else or to help someone. Yet Christ wanted mercy. Christ didn't have anything to keep. He wasn't looking for perfect people, he was looking for passionate people, the people who were considered outcasts. How many times have I pointed fingers and judged others for there bad decisions. What a bad decision I made. What is Mercy?
compassion or forgiveness shown toward someone whom it is within one's power to punish or harm. I have to look at others as though I'm no different. I am no different, I'm as much a sinner as they are. We're all sick, in need of a savior.

Hits me, if its a sacrifice to help the sick? I'm not thinking right. I'm also sick, in need of a savior.

I must protect you from yourself - Jacopo

For "Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved."

Romans 10:13 NLT

At first I'm reminded of the count of Monte Cristo when Jacopa tells him he will protect him even if he has to protect him from himself.

Edmond: If you ever presume to interfere in my affairs again, I will, I promise you, finish the job I started the day we met! Do you understand?
Jacopo: I understand you are mad.
Edmond: Mad? My enemies are falling into my traps perfectly!
Jacopo: Mad, your grace, for ignoring this: you have a fortune, a beautiful woman who loves you. Take the money, take the woman, and live your life! Stop this plan, take what you have won!
Edmond: I can't.
Jacopo: Why not?... I'm still your man, Satara. I swore an oath I will protect you. Even if it means I must protect you from yourself. I'll drive you home now.


What is calling on God, and what is being saved?  I never prayed for a wife, I guess I was so logical that I thought what if God has no one, then I'm wasting my time praying. Sip some coffee, I read and think. It's like, what does God know about business? What does God know about vengeance?  What does God know about enemies? I find I get so stuck in my ways about surviving. Susan and I have been surviving since we were hit by the economy 4 years ago. Caring that kind of economic fear is heavy. All Edmond could think about was getting back at his friend. He really wanted him to pay for everything. He didn't, for a second think of the reverse. The whole situation made him grow. I grew in business knowledge last year. I find I live in my marriage and my business life, racing against the clock to provide a good life, when its really one to give to God.

Hits me, Edmond said "I can't". Edmond couldn't see through his vengeance and his plan. I'm like this but with no plan. Saved from what? Saved from myself? I'm known to be faithful, to get the job done. I stick with it, I finish what I start. It's hard for me to let go when I've been hurt. Why do I hold on to pain? Why can't I just flush the toilet and wash my hands? I need to accept the fact that I've been saved and quit putting my chains back on.

An Old Dog, teaching new tricks

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold all things have become new.

2 Corinthians 5:17 NLT

I want this call this one, "teaching an old dog, new tricks" why? Because I get stuck in my old tricks. Doing things the same way gets confused with a consistent routine. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I keep on seeing and old dog in this. Don't teach me anything new. Don't tell me things I already know. Leave me alone. Sure I'm a christian, now leave me alone. Let me blend into the wall. Let me study God. Don't tell me what to do. How often have I lived in my past. Instead of letting old things pass away, I let them dictated my life. This new creation thing, seems like too much to handle, so why embrace it? why live in it? It's the hurt heart that keeps me back from living in freedom. I've lived as a christian for most of my life and stuck in fear of the new creation. It's like on karate kid, when Daniel had to re learn karate and he hated it. As a viewer, I enjoyed watching these new tricks. If I were in Daniels shoes, would I have reacted the same way? Yes. I would be leary that washing a car and sanding a floor would get me anywhere. In that case it was an old dog, teaching new tricks. It's what I call the old school way, that helps me to get back with God. I better change this title.

Hits me, I feel like an old dog, that has to teach myself new tricks of this new creation the old fashion way. It doesn't matter, sometimes it's following a simple routine, finshing the job, getting it done right, being honest. With so much dishonesty, the old tricks, seem new. Living as a new creation, knowing that old things HAVE passed away. Thats not easy, it's a new trick I'm learning.

Coping Fortress

The name of the Lord is a strong fortress; the godly run to him and are safe.

Proverbs 18:10 NLT

At first I'm thinking, Godly? I am considered godly? Sip some coffee, I read and think. I read this wrong again. I keep reading it as the Lord is a strong fortress and not the name of the Lord. Run to Him and be safe. The name and run. I find, I'm in a day and era of acknowledgement and humility. i can acknowledge anyone on facebook, tag them, get notifications. When it comes to God, I fear. He's my strong fortress. I don't run to him until later at times. But why? Because I don't want to get hurt again, and usually running to Him, means pain and growth. I want this life to be easy. I think of all the bible stories out there and 90% were in fear. God kept saying "do not fear". I keep on thinking "strong fortress" but fail to see it's his name. I make my own fortress and it's pretty week. You won't hear "the name" on the news, they can't say it. Yet it's the person's name I credit. He touches the heart and freaks me out. My heart has been hardened, it's been broken, I have only one. Whenever i humble myself and credit God, I am opening my broken and wounded heart. That hurts. My coping nature isn't to run to him and be safe.

Hits me, with the name of God come's the strong fortress. Yet I attempt to build my own. I can't do it without Him.

Road to Success

John 6:12-15

When they had all had enough to eat, he said to his disciples, “Gather the pieces that are left over. Let nothing be wasted.” So they gathered them and filled twelve baskets with the pieces of the five barley loaves left over by those who had eaten. After the people saw the sign Jesus performed, they began to say, “Surely this is the Prophet who is to come into the world.” Jesus, knowing that they intended to come and make him king by force, withdrew again to a mountain by himself.

I'm not sure what to think about this. He saved the left over food and then with drew by himself because he could tell they were going to make him king. Sip some coffee, I read and think. Jesus had no ego, even through his fame, he sought to save the food and then almost got overwhelmed by all the attention and removed himself. It's God even though he was being glorified, also had the human instinct of pressure and withdrew. I look at facebook and its all about self gratification, how many likes can I get. He was about the truth.  It's the road to success. The road is anything but straight. It's like thinking that I'll sell a lot of a product, when it's not selling.  It's like not paying attention to the product that is selling and not capitalizing on that. I'm blind. I get lost, I've lost count of how many people have sought me out as a sales person. If that product is good, it'll sell itself. It's how Walt Disney did it, when he drew Mickey Mouse on the train. It's Thomas Edison trying so many different strands of wire until he got it right. It's getting lost on the road, I know where it's not. It's saying hi to someone that can't see me.

Hits me, Jesus' human instinct wasn't to glorify himself and say "crown me king" to everyone, it was to withdraw and be alone, because it was far deeper than the need for attention. He was there to free and forgive, and until the cross would they recognize that, not by crowning him king in a crowd. Society seeks to glorify people, therefore they wanted to do that to Jesus. It wasn't time until Jesus said "it is finished". It was His road to success.