Thursday, February 28, 2013

Driver through prayer

Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done

Philippians 4:6 NLT

This is the prayer verse. As I sip coffee this morning, and read this, the first two words pop out. Don't worry. That is the whole deal. I don't worry about stuff usually. But then there are the moments where I don't know how it's going to happen with God. I don't know what to do, I need an answer.  I feel stuck. There's a lot going on in this verse. There's a lot going on in my life. Do I really mean what I pray? Do I ask God for help and worry more? I've lost count of the movies with prayer in them. that moment where they're at their last thread. Last year I noticed a sign at my church "drive through prayer". I thought was a great idea. There's a drive through everything these days, why not prayer. After a few weeks, I felt stuck in some decisions and got some prayer. They gave me a receipt simply to document the date and encouraged me to follow up with them about the results. Mostly I was amazed of how serious they were about whatever was on my heart. They really wanted to help. Whenever I'm driving, I always think of the cars and people on the road and where they are at in life. Then I begin to think about prayer and really what it is. What is this action that I've been raised to do? before every meal, during church, before a trip, to find something I've lost, for help, illness, to get better, confidence, fear, hurt, rejection, career, what to say, etc. On my knees, in the car, at work, on the phone, on facebook, in song, in a poem, praying the word. Then whats up with people responding while you're praying? Or whats the deal with how to pray? The lords prayer, it's like giving a gift to someone and not letting go of it. It was always about health and major crisis. after baptism, and of course going on a mission trip. Or is it? What is the right way? Is there a right way? Is it the words or the attitude? Do I judge someone based on how they pray? Praying is powerful, it's a unique thing I feel uncomfortable with at times. I don't feel anything while doing it. I feel it after. When someone prays for me, I feel the spirit, and feel hopeful and sometimes i don't feel anything. I read and think, then there's acknowledging God when He's provided and recognizing him. I've prayed many times on my way to shows, that everything works out. It's like calling for someones help and help shows up and acknowledging them . It's the need for help, it's seeing that I like to do things myself but I can't do everything. It's recognizing these insecurities that I have always had and asking for a cure instead of avoiding them. Why does prayer seem weird to me? I think because when I see others doing it, they are exposing to me that they don't have it all together. It's the intimate side that I'm afraid to show in public. Yet the public is insecure. The public drives up for prayer. These are human beings. It's a humbling thing. Sometimes i don't want to pray because I'm mad. Especially pray for other people when I'm mad.

Hits me, prayer is a powerful thing. It's strong, its valuable, there's no app for it, its always instant access, even in groans and tears God hears me. It's no contest, its simply God saying he loves me and wants to hear from me. It's Him saying, I've left my spirit for you. It's Him saying to me, I'm His own. It's me saying I need help. It's Him saying, I've got your back. Sometimes its me saying nothing special. He wants to hear from me, even though I know what His word says. I'm thinking at times, well God already knows what I'm thinking. He wants to hear me say it, even when its crazy and stupid. I keep on having to remember that God is eternal and I"m not. What he's thinking sometimes isn't what I'm thinking. And that's what He wants to work on me with, is seeing the world through His eyes and not mine. When that happens, worrying isn't such a big deal because I know who I'm praying to and am greatful for that. Whether it's in a movie theater or a drive through, He's listening.

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