You want to get to him, you gotta go through me! - Spiderman 2

— Proverbs 16:7 —

When the Lord takes pleasure in anyone’s way,
he causes their enemies to make peace with them.

At first I'm thinking, very cool. Very interesting. Its almost hard to believe until that person who is giving you a hard time, all the sudden is cool with you. We celebrated my mom and Susans birthdays last night. It was fun. I missed my sisters though, but it was cool to see mom and dads pictures from Kenya. They were tired, I could tell. As I read this passage this morning, I'm reminded of what faith I need to have with God in pretty much any circumstance. And not take Gods provision for granted and then again not read into anything. I'm amazed of how lonely I feel, yet God is on my side. I'm reminded of Spiderman 2, when Peter Parker stops the train from going off the tracks. It was the moment when his mask flew off and his identity was revealed, he passed out after saving everyone, and everyone supported him. one of the passengers says, If you want to get to him, you gotta go through me! At the end, even his enemy made peace with him. Peter was just trying to help and keep the place safe. the professor that was on his side, made an invention that took a wrong turn and disabled him and made him do things he wouldn't nomally do. I'm amazed of how many time I think my enemies are bigger than God, yet God has peace in plan for the future and not fear, they know not what they do. Hits me, I need to trust that God is cool with me and is for me, and that whoever is out to get me, will come through in time, most likely not my time, but in his time. Like Peter, I just need to keep being who I am to be.

Honest Strangers

— Luke 16:10 —

"Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much."

 

The first thing that I think of is Captain Jack Sparrows line from Pirates of the Caribean. A dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest, the honest you have to looking out for, because for they may be honest and do something stupid, or something like that. Trying to finish up things at work there just doesn't seem to be enough hours in a day. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I wonder where dishonesty came from? of course the fall of man but what makes one single person decide to say or do something that has potential of hurting people? I can only think of how often I judge someone who is sitting on the side of something playing an instrument. I immediately think, pan handling. I immediately think dishonesty. Susan and I while on our honeymoon were at a restuaurant in Adventureland at Disneyland. As we ate our dinner, a mother approached us and asked if her child could sit with us for 10 minutes while she figured some stuff out. We were fine with it, we weren't leaving. She left her 7 year old with us and came back in about 10 minutes and left. We appeared to be honest strangers. Did we send off a vibe that said, "no worries"?. Jack Sparrow was very dishonest and he almost had to be in order to stay alive. However, everyone would some how trust him and then find out how dishonest he was, when he proved how honest he wasn't. I read and think. I'm also reminded of what motivated me to become responsible. It wasn't "ok, Nathan grow up", it was "I can't stand it when others aren't trust worthy". If you say your going to do something, and you don't follow through, please tell me ahead of time". Alot of times we don't know. I would end up and tell people, I can in 6 to 8 months or I can get you your wedding done by your first anniversary, I'm sorry I'm just too busy. Then they would say, what are you doing that makes you so busy? too much. Hits me, I have definitely established a reputation with people, I'm not quite sure of what it is but its something trust worthy or possibly flakey. I sometimes feel people I've done work for still allow to serve them because they like me but I'm not sure. As Jack Sparrow appeared to be honest in a dishonest way, I need to be that stranger who appears to be honest in an honest way which starts out with the little things, because if I can't with little things, the big things won't happen.

Thrashful living

— 1 Peter 2:12 —

Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.

 

At first I'm thinking, only the strong survive. This one takes me back to my rejection years.  I hate going back to the 5th grade at times, yet I feel that those are the most critical years of a childs development into man and woman. coffee's good this morning, I read and think. Im a guy who doesn't give up. I only do when im rejected. The rest of the time i just do until i get frustrated and then that even fades away. I don't get frustrated easily but the pain of rejection from the gospel can really hurt. Hits me, even the worst of moments aren't as they seem. God has his own way of dealung wirh people and even when it seems he's not working and im being thrashed, its how he works, even when it doesn't make sense.

You've got me? Who's got you? - Lois Lane

The men were amazed and asked, "What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!"

—Matthew 8:27

 

At first I'm thinking, its this end of a fight scene or the end of a great explosion, the climax of the movie, you're like whoe. You were expecting Jesus do to something, but weren't expecting what happened to happen. Today is Susans Birthday. She's taken the day off from work, as have I, only but for a 3 pm meeting I have get today with a client. We'll get out just intime for Birthday dinner. I always look at Birthdays as time to reflect on last year and time to focus on the person who's birthday it is. Whenever we go to a Birthday party, I try not to be selfish and think of why I'm not having fun, or who to talk to, but how can I bless the birthday person. How else do I shop? Sip some coffee, I read and think. I've always been fascinated by super hero's and their powers to do things humans can't do. Like Superman, he's got this nerdy image of Clark Kent, but the audience knows, he's really superman. I'm amazed how Jerry Siegel first created this character in 1932 to almost be that of Christ. He appeared working for the Daily Planet at the age of 30 to help save the world. The winds didn't obey him, but he flew, and all the waves did was freeze when he blew. But still he was superman, and he had a weakness of kryptonite. While there's no comparison between him and Christ, I do find that the two had enemies and doubters. However the major difference between the two was internal and external. All superheros accept for some of the x-men were focuses on physically helping people, while Christ was focused on the soul. He was focused on what was keeping us from truly living a full life. Everyone Christ spoke to had been living a lie of deceit unbeknownst to them. He came to give them the truth to set them free. They had no idea they were trapped. I mean, Mary Magdelene had 7 demons in her without knowing it, she was just troubled. I read and think. I'm reminded of the scene when Clark Kent see's the helicopter hanging from the building, goes into the phonebooth and comes out as superman, fly's up to helicopter, get's Lois Lane and she says "You've got me? Who's got you?" Hits me, how many times have I asked God, that question? Do you really have me? Can you handle this? This is a pretty big problem, because I can't handle it. Here's superman, the man of steel and Lois wasn't used to this. Christ can do anything, yet I fear his word or even sharing his word with strangers, why? Am I worried he can't handle them, or am I worried that I'm not ready to repesent? I have to learn to let the people see God for their own. He can handle them, I can't and I'm not supposed. Lois ended up falling in love with Superman and that's what God wants me to do, is fall in love with Him and only be thinking of what He wants me to do, in our relationship.

I don't want to hear it

I told you that you would die in your sins; if you do not believe that I am the one I claim to be, you will indeed die in your sins.

—John 8:24

 

I always try to put myself in these peoples shoes, when I read verses like this one. I bet they knew Jesus from childhood and now there friend claims to be the messiah and throws something like this at them? Knowing me,  I would need to have time for myself and think. Works been busy this week, just trying to get caught up, things are working out, but just need to work more hours to and try to relax too. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I imagine a relative at the age of 30 approaching me and saying this. How do i respond? I'd probably say "really". Knowing me, I would watch him and really evaulate everything he does. It's that old friend that wants you to join him to get rich. I just can't do that. Whenever I'm caught off guard, regardless of what it is, I always stall especially if the person is cornering me or something. I respect everyone to begin with, until I feel them out, then I place them into a category: flakey, genius, smarter than me, not my type. Don't get me wrong, I'll still talk to the people but will put my empathetic face on and and just live with it. Its tough when someone claims what Christ claimed. In this day and age, I can imagine christ getting a sarcastic response from someone, like "great, I want to go to hell", yet the truth would make them think. I'm reminded of this multi-church mens weekend I was just at called Thrive. This years theme was Fearless. We had 12 churches that attended, so about 410 men showed up at Lost Canyon. The Men's camp consisted of opportunity to address your personal problems with fellow men. The stuff that men need to share with me, the stuff we tend to keep stuffed inside, the stuff we don't care about or consider forgettable. We discovered that a weekend just isn't enough. Us men were hit between the eyes with 4 speakers that spoke about being fearless. Its tough when God speaks and you know he's right. Hits me, I ran into several different men at this retreat that really were direct with me about my marriage, my life, everything. I didn't like it, because I wasn't expecting it. The people weren't expecting one of there own to be the Messiah, but he was. Sometimes I don't expect someone I know to tell me what i don't want to here. God had plans for me that weekend, plans to reveal things to me, that I wasn't expecting. I needed to listen, which I didn't at times, but I needed the directness. He showed me, I don't need to understand why, I just need to let be in me, and let go.

Emberrassing God

He replied, "My mother and brothers are those who hear God's word and put it into practice."

—Luke 8:21

 

In this day and age, its "my mother and brothers don't believe". In my case, I can greatfully say, that my family hear's God's word and puts into practice. I'm tired this morning, working on the Thrive's promo, I've been praying about it, and Eric and I have come up with a good idea. I find myself really too black and white alot. He kind of comes as an outsider looking in and gives me a good perspective. I think too much about things alot. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I can only imagine what Jesus went through with the crowds. So many people wanting to be healed. When his family arrived, and he was notified, all he said, was they heard God's word and put it into practice. He could have said "oh cool, where" or "oh great, hope I'm not embarrasing the family". I always emberrased my family growing up. But He kept his focus on God's word and what they did with it. How many times have i been too insecure to face my family and friends with the truth, in fear of them thinking I'm trying to be more holy. The truth was, they were on his side. Sure i know my family practices God's word, but do I acknowledge that when I see them. Jesus was pretty much telling the crowd that his family could assist them too. Could God say that to me? or do I emberrase Him? Hits me, I find I can really speak my true heart in a blog, you get me with a group of unsaved guys, my mouth is shut. You put in with a group of saved guys, I can talk. If Jesus saw me, what would he say? Would I be able to help others put God's word into practice? or Would Christ say "he's emberrased of me". I feel like an embarrassement alot, why? Because I fear man's reaction. I found myself praying for my high school bully's yesterday, really believing he could save a few of them. Yes I speak of what some call religion, when really its a relationship, a relationship I am afraid of at times. Yet a relationship I can't live without and can't but put into practice.

Credible Networking

We want to avoid any criticism of the way we administer this liberal gift [the money that had been given for the Christians in Jerusalem]. For we are taking pains to do what is right, not only in the eyes of the Lord but also in the eyes of men.

—2 Corinthians 8:20-21

One of the money verses. Ive always wondered what its like when a missionary writes a letter to friends requesting what they call a "gift","donation". Then when they get the amount they need, how they spend it. I always assume, they have all accounting accurate and organized. I would be nervous, I would be thinking, oh crap, I got the money in, is this really what God wants me to do? or did I just make a mistake? It was a good Thrive weekend, when you go to a mens retreat, you never know what to expect. Some weekends I'm praying for the men, this weekend, God was really speaking to me about my past. I got a lot of questions answered. Sipping alot of coffee this morning, I read and think.

I live in a day and age of service. With the social networks booming, there is a new way of marketing, its called credibility, no more direct sales pitch. The days are gone of advertising about what you do. From my questions and answers, its all about credibility and honesty. If I'm not? I will be exposed and quickly. It's no different than simple acts of kindness, sharing photos of a shoot, to giving tips away of my industry. Give things away for free, with no intention of making a profit, but in making yourself credible. I'm reminded of Tucker, the car manufacturer who had a great idea, but no prototype. He thought simply, I'll just put a picture of what my idea is in a magazine and then sell it. It doesn't work that way, uh you need to a working prototype and then show it. Not the other way around. He was able to make a prototype but in the long run, it was a mistake. I'm amazed of how God's hand is not just in my personal life but in my business life as well. God is very business savvy. I never thought about it, but everything wraps around Him. He is all about being glorified, and the second I turn things around and make them about me, sure he'll let it happen but He'll show me what where he's not. A business has to step out in faith at times and donate services, just as an individual or family feels called to do reach out to a foreign community. It might be my donated money, time, or resources, either way God's hand is in it. Then its the temptation during it at times, that I'm wasting my time. I look back alot at the video work I've donated over the years, and I see one thing, experience. I have established credibility with people without knowing it. That's the society I'm in. Giving servies, advice, thoughts, ideas. Hits me, God is credible, He's my example, whether he's hinting to me to donate, give, or receive, I need to remember that He provides and always will. He also gives me wisdom on when to say no. Just as he provides for everyone else he provides for me, the way he does it, I question a lot, but he knows what he's doing. I can have fear of what man thinks, but God knows what he's doing, sometimes it will be me accepting a donation and other times its me donating, either way it's His deal not mine.

A Box for God

When men tell you to consult mediums and spiritists, who whisper and mutter, should not a people inquire of their God? Why consult the dead on behalf of the living?

—Isaiah 8:19

 

I kind of laugh when I read this, I'm thinking, Good point. Why would you consult the dead rather than the living. I'm at Thrive this weekend. A Men's Retreat and the theme is Fearless. Fearless to be a man of God or fearless to do anything that he's calling you to do. God's been hitting me with a lot of things this weekend. He's put different men in my life for the different areas that I've been fighting all my life. I think my biggest is my identity. I ran into my cousin who was able to explain to me why my upbringing is affecting my relationship with God. I had the revelation yesterday. I had two brothers actually ask me if I was saved. Thats the biggest insult ever. Another brother asking if you're saved? I got offended. Sip some crappy camp coffee, I read and think. I'm amazed of the distractions around me these days. I'm amazed of how decieved I can get without knowing it. How many sermons' have I judged and evuluated to think I could do better. How many worship songs have I just not enjoyed because I'm not sure if I like the guy who's singing them? How many times have I walked into an assembly of believers unfree and left miserable? How many times have I been preached to like I'm an idiot and left pissed off because of how it was presented to me? Now I have never consulted a medium, but I'm amazed of how many people do. I read and think, I'm amazed how much control I want to have over God and when I recieve things. I've built such a nice box for God to live in. Its funny, my box is empty because God isn't like that. So I go to my box thinking that God is in there, and with it being empty, that's basicly how I feel. It's no different than consulting the dead, just empty. Don't get me wrong, its good to be cautious about what's presented, but not like that. When God is using someone to speak truth to me, and because I wasn't expecting it, I don't want to listen. Because Its out of my control I find myself holding on until when I say its time, I listen. Then I get the guys, that just want to fix me. I won't let them. Hits me, this box I thought God lived in, is empty, just like the grave. He wants me to allow Him to live in me, and not choose this box, due to lack of control. I can go anywhere else to for my worth, and I'll be empty, He's always be waiting at the door until its time to let him in, only he knows that time, not me, even though I thought I did.

tired of trying

When evening came, many who were demon-possessed were brought to him, and he drove out the spirits with a word and healed all the sick. This was to fulfill what was spoken through the prophet Isaiah: "He took up our infirmities and carried our diseases."

—Matthew 8:16-17

 At first I'm thinking, its one of those scenes, where a bunch of frustrated people are trying to figure out something with technology, finally a technician comes in the room and shows them how to do it, and they are so relieved. They ask What did you do? How did you do that? And sometimes even, would you like to work for us as our technician? Working late nights these days, hacking away at projects, working on the business, getting ready for busy season. Tired this morning, sip some coffee, I read and think. I find myself not being able to comprehend that Jesus grabbed my struggles and illnesses and carried them. I think so many times about him just helping me live with them. So many times I find myself dealing with stuff, forgetting that christ already took them and I have to believe my identity is not in them but in him. It's weird because I remember them. Yet I feel God hinting to me, that its all in a season. I have to learn to give them to God and not learn to deal with them. Just as in certain fields of work, people are educated differently. Let the right person deal with this problem. I can't but think of when I was helping out with audio visual at church and then went to the hotel industry. I learned of how much the hotel relied on audio video technicians to help them. I thought I knew alot, but I didn't. As I was trained, I learned about things, I had always wondered about. Going back to church, I ran into situations of frustrated people, who just wanted to it work. It was this burden, yet no funds to hire a professional. Equipment would be broken due to lack of knowledge of how to operate it. The frustration and misunderstanding was evident, yet even when we would explain why, it just wasn't understood. Hits me, how many times have I tried to understand my struggle or my disease? Yet God is saying, just give it to me, I'm designed to carry it. He can help me understand why He allowed it during that season, or why I have this condition, but more, how much I need his help.

The young may be strong, but the older ones have more experience - John Wayne

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father."

—Romans 8:15

 

At first I'm thinking, man how decieved I get. It's like getting new software because it says you can do a certain thing, I don't kow how to use it, and so I just leave it alone and hope for the best. Instead I should take a class or just read the instructions. Didn't sleep well again, I slept better. As I was getting into bed, I heard a few people talking outside, so I checked it out, and finally learned that there was a police barracade by our place. After I went outside to check it out, I learned that someone man across the way had fallen down his steps, hit his head and died. I hadn't seen anything like this since 2010. I didn't know the man, my neighbors told me he was tall and drank alot and probably lost his footing. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I'm reminded of another John Wayne line from the Cowboys. As the cowboys come upon two cows battling it out, he says "the young may be strong but the older ones have more experience." I find myself being strong and thinking that I can handle this life on my own even if I have the spirit. But its asking the older ones, my mentors for help. For advice on how to cry out Abba, Father. I look back at my 20's and I see me following, I see me sliding. Now I look back and recognize the experience I've gained, yet the weakness I feel. It's those moments that I need to cry out, Abba, Father. I might be strong but I am a strong slave to fear. I need to reverse that become a strong cryer. By consulting my seniors who have more experience, that experience will give me the strength I didn't know I had. I'll probably battle it out with them too.

Master Identity

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10 nlt

At first I'm thinking of how often I don't believe this one. How often do I leave this type of thing in the dust and think what I think is best for me should go? We had a busy weekend, I had a long shoot on Saturday, which mentally exhausted me. We then visited Grandma Kinkel and then dinner with my Father in law and his family. Shayne blew us all away when she proved to us she could swim with floaty's on. She's just like her mom, just catches on to stuff real quick, with no fear. The pool water was also like bath water and very warm. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I often think of what things God is prepping me for now. Then I forget to look back at how he prepared me for this. I honestly think of my sister Sarah's family. I just got the August newsletter and it was celebration of how they had the biggest camps ever in Croatia. Stevo mentioned how they went with a new strategy this time, and in return more people came because there goal was different. It's like me and marketing, I think consumers think a certain way and I find out they don't. At the shoot I did this weekend with single mom's with cancer, a number of their stories were "I was not expecting this", "I had plans". I then am reminded of Neo from the Matrix and how the agents keep on trying to convince him he is Mr. Anderson and not Neo. They know he's the savior and know his plans, and they don't want him to succeed. The more lies he can believe and confused he can get, they'll win. I'm amazed of how many time I don't believe I'm God's masterpiece. I understand what He says but I don't live it. I find myself to be so optimistic and just go with things that I don't take the time to see his truth come through in a situation. God's a patient God, He reveals his plan for me in his timing. My timing is always too quick and my reasoning is just too impulsive. Hits me, I'm not my masterpiece, but God's. I too many times think I have to do it on my own instead of obeying Him and letting Him craft me through each situation. Even when I think He's taking a break he's not or when He's taking too long, He's actually ahead. Sarah and Stevo tried everything, then stepped out in faith with a different strategy. The Singletonmoms had no choice but to reach out for help from their previous dreams, only to find new hope, help and support unlike anything they ever imagined and neo? The sooner he accepted his Identity and let the matrix live it through him, the agents left him alone. God is my matrix, I don't need to understand everything or wonder why, I just have to strive to accept my identity is in Him. Now to title this one.

Super Singletons

And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.

—Romans 8:11

I always think of a superhero, really any of them, when I read verses like these. It's almost like something I don't deserve, and wasn't expecting. How do i activeate this spirit inside of me. Today I shoot interviews for a video showing in November. I always get nervous about shoots, especially of this size. I'll be shooting a 11 single women who have cancer. It's an organization that my friend from High School founded about 7 years ago. The organization is call Singletonmoms. A community of women who assist with the day to day practical needs of single parents with cancer. Those are superhero's to me. Those are people who see a need and help out. One lady we interviewed said, Europe just doesn't do this, they let the government take care of it. The volunteers and care givers are the heros to help these innocent single parents in need. In turn the when most of the single parents go into remission, they become volunteers and heros. Its a win, win. Today I listen to the dreams the women had prior to getting cancer, how it changed there life and how the Singleton moms community has brought them hope. They're not a religious organization and that doesn't matter. God speaks to people in there own way, to do things that honor him. How else do people get saved? Sure I can do a bunch of good and be tempted to think I"ll go to heaven because of that. But sometimes that thought doesn't even occur to me. Seeing the need does. I also think of Charlie Wilson's war. Same situation, this politician did not live a moral lifestyle yet saw the need to help out a desperate suffering country. I'm also reminded of how discouraged I can get when I'm doing what I need to be doing. The conflicting thoughts I get into. The doubts I have. All my insecurities appear. That's why I have to make way for the spirit to move. Hits me, if I really want to know my purpose, I need to let God through and I'll see all along how he's been showing me where I need to be.  

condemnation vs. life

Jesus straightened up and asked her [the woman caught in adultery], "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" "No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."

—John 8:10-11

 

The first thing I think of are the battles I have in my mind throughout the year. Sometimes they last for seconds, sometimes for weeks, God always gives me assurance that they will be over and I will be free. Didn't sleep well. Just a lot on my mind. Its crazy when you go to bed and the mixture of emotion combined with work, combined with conflict, combined with dehydration, combined with anything else, can make you dream of. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I'm reminded of how many times I condemn myself for things. Yet this scripture simply says "no need". He condemns the sin not the person. I get tempted to condemn myself and hate the sin. I believe this lie that says " beat myself up and then I'll be fine because I must own my own problem. Well then what was the cross for. Yeah, it was for show, and I'm supposed to do the same thing. I read and think, is it really that simple? "just leave my life of sin?" what if it happens again? Hits me, God continues to let me know of temptations yet to come and I need to listen to Him. He continues to remind me that I'm made in His image and not my own. He'll use these circumstances to refine me and grind me down. It hurts in the process but it is as simple as going now and leaving my life of sin. I can start now, I don't have to be ready. It doesn't matter what it is, its a simple as just leaving it.

Frisco Kid

But food does not bring us near to God; we are no worse if we do not eat, and no better if we do. Be careful, however, that the exercise of your freedom does not become a stumbling block to the weak.

—1 Corinthians 8:8-9

 

At first I'm thinking............I'm not sure what to think. I had to go back to the beginning of the chapter to realize this was about idol worship. Talk about walking into  the middle of a conversation. I'm amazed of how many things that I do, can cause another brother or sister to stumble. It's crazy, I'm also reminded of how I can be influenced to bend my beliefs out of fear. I'm reminded of the Frisco Kid with Harrison Ford and Gene Widler. I had it on while working last night. Wilder plays a jewish Rabbi sent from Poland in the 1850's to San Francisco to lead a synogogue and marry his bride. The Rabbi is really innocent and gets taken advantage of many times where he loses everything he has. Harrison Ford comes in as a train robber. Recognizing the Rabbi's innocence, guides him to San Francisco. The Rabbi isn't used to the ways of America and how radical the cowboy lives. He focus's on his Tora and his beliefs. Along there journey the Rabbi doesn't bend in his beliefs even though the cowboy does. I read and think, how many times have I been with either believers or non-believers and have bent my faith or caused them too? If i bring out a beer to drink or if someone shows me a competitors video, I get jealous and envious. They were only trying to share with me something I have interest in. Little did they know, it doesn't help. I appease them and say "wow, thanks". Give me a referal next time. Or its like when you put a movie on for friends and some are offended by it, try shutting off the movie. By the time the Rabbi got to San Francisco and met his bride, he was almost done with his identity due to having to kill a thief. He wanted to be a cowboy, but the cowboy kept telling him, he was a rabbi. The cowboy was influenced by him, the rabbi didn't realize it. Without knowing it, the Rabbi had told the cowboy that his lifestyle as a bank robber and thief weren't necessary and he could be a God fearing  man, he had become his best friend. Sure I get messed up at times, i do things that make other believers sin and I don't realize it. It's God living in me, and me letting him work through me, to prove to them that who they go to for guidience is critical and as long as I keep to my belief's and are sensitive to their struggles they will in time see that only God matters.

Sinful Society

When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her [the woman caught in adultery]."

—John 8:7

 At first I'm thinking, what a come back for adultery. I always thought Christ was going to in silence just remove her and get stoned himself. But thats not his style, he'd rather qoute the truth. Sip some coffee, I read and think. What throws me off is that he didn't say anything about adultery, he said without sin. Sin is a big one, I often tend to rank sins, yes there are some sins that I consider little ones, yet I'm aware that they're all equal. Pride is the most deadly, however adultery is considered a big one too. I googled, what "bad sins" people considered. It felt weird reading what they thought. Basicly it was those actions that keep us away from God and focused on ourselves. I read and think, I'm amazed of how blinded I get from sin. These people were questioning Jesus. They weren't accusing him, they were stoning her. I can't but think of facebook, when there's a crazy story, and everyone is just lashing out at what kind of terrible person the person is. I'm reminded of the chick fila being in the news right now. The entire world knew it was a christian company, so of course there stance on homosexuality would be according to scripture. As I read the comments on azcentral.com, I couldnt' believe of out of hand things were getting. Yes according to scripture homosexuality is a sin, just as pride, jealously, envy are. Christ didn't say "start throwing stones, starting from the last to the first". He said "throw only if you haven't sinned". Yell at the person who got in the accident if you never text while driving. People need to drive the speed limit, while you speed past them. Hits me, Christ spoke the truth, because he is the truth, the woman needed to be loved, not stoned. I live in a society that rewrites everything and can customize everything. I can't customize the bible to do what I want the truth to be. The word's the word, I can mentally change it, put it on the shelf and mentally live my life the way I see fit, but God will still be God and his truth will still be there regardless of how I choose to live. I find myself having a difficult time not accepting a sin story from someone else. I end up laughing and agreeing instead of qouting the truth. But don't they know the truth, do I need to speak it. Am I willing to lose a friend due to my beliefs? Am i judging them by qouting the truth or am I saving them from a life they have know idea they are living? Until I can see them through christ's eyes I won't know,  and only he can show me.

Scatter - Bodenseehoff

Those who had been scattered preached the word wherever they went.

—Acts 8:4

The first thing I think of is bible school at bodenseehof. My principal at the time told us that whenever were at an event not to huddle in our little groups but to "scatter" and talk to everyone. I had no problem with that but the language barrier was a bit of an issue. Sip some coffee, I read and think. I find myself a bit physically scattered everyday of the week but when it gets to preaching the word, I go numb. It's like I just get numb. When around christians its easier. It's almost like when I have to explain why technology isn't working right to someone who doesn't understand it. I try not to use tech words which can help. In a preaching setting, I don't want to preach. I fear what they will think of the God of the universe. It's because I apply the truth of the word to my life. The spiritual world is a world many people don't want to get into. Once I bring that into the conversation, and I'm not prepared, oops. It's like when I talk about home theatre, they ask me, what I have. I have nothing, I don't need anything. Am I a hypocrite? They laugh usually. I tell them I don't need anything but one day I will get it. My sister Heather told me in High School "just pretend they're already saved". I'm also reminded of a prayer walk I did on Mill Avenue back in 2003 and I ran into a church from the west valley who was street preaching. I walked up to them and asked them what they were doing? I said "if you're in the west valley, minister over there" don't come over here, these kids need a coffee house conversation, not some old person telling them to repent. They told me, that I need to focus on that 10% of people who will respond. I responded, "look, the guy with the finger sure is responding", they walked away (old farts). I'm also reminded of the book I read a few years ago (yes, I actually read a book and finished it) called So you don't want to go to church anymore. It was about a pastor who wondered into a coffee house and met another man who was answering questions about God. The two men eventually would bump into each other for the next few years where one man would really minister to the pastor. Nothing was scheduled they just bumped into each spontaneously. Then I'm reminded of the great commission. Then of St. Francis famous qoute - "Preach the gospel if necesary use words". I have to say, words are powerful. that statement "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" is a bunch of crap. Words are huge. Hits me, when did I get scattered? The second I was saved and went on my daily things. Since God lives within me, wherever I go and whoever I run into, his love will show through my simple actions and reactions regardless of how I feel about the situation or what kind of schedule I'm on.