Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Cool people eat junk food

“And while they were there, the time came for her baby to be born. She gave birth to her first child, a son. She wrapped him snugly in strips of cloth and laid him in a manger, because there was no lodging available for them.” Luke 2:6-7 NLT

Wow that was quick. When my wife had our daughter it wasn't "ok it's time" seeming so pleasant, it was more Holy &(^&#^#!!!!. I'm a little sleep deprived this morning. Worked late last night and didn't have a lot of rest. It's a little later in the morning so I've already had my coffee. I read and think, I'm reminded of how innocent I was as a child, how as I grew older, I wanted to be like the older guys, the other families. I wanted to be cool. Other people always seemed to be doing things right, or other kids seemed to be pick up the class assignments much faster than I. I didn't like my life, I even wanted a different name than my own, I didn't like "Nathan" I wanted to be called "John". I didn't like who I was. I wanted to be good at sports, I wanted to be book smart. I wanted to fit in, I found myself getting energy from the crowd but not gaining anything from it except losing my voice due to talking too much. As I hit my late 20's I realized that my childhood character would always be who I was and wouldn't change, but how I used that, and drew from it, would make me who I am now. I read and think, I even thought eating junk food was cool and taking care of myself with healthy food was nerdy. I also thought that eventually the bible would just wear off and would be a "has been" due to changes in the world. Hits me, I can go on in my life trying to be the way I think I need to appear to be, and be frustrated and not like who I am, and wish I was like other people I know, and even strive to compete with them at times or I can look and see the answer in front of my face. Christ was born exactly how he was to be born, in todays' world, so bacterial infested and a germ environment. So unhealthy, but He wants to prove to me that God is in charge, because God is real, and real things happen when God's there. Just as the birth of His own son was real and honest and vulnerable, He wants me to know that I can be the same way with Him, and He'll reveal himself to me, allowing me to be vulnerable with Him. Christ's birth is embarrassing, if this happened to anybody but God, which it does, I'd be quick to condemn and judge the responsible parties involved. But He continues to tell me, I provide in ways you don't know about and my plans aren't your plans, you'll never figure me out. I just have to let Him be Him in me. I can eat all the junk food I want and feel terrible, believing that I'm being cool. When I choose to eat healthy food (because I'm getting sick pretty much from eating junk) and feel better and exercise, I might feel like a nerd but I'm actually taking care of myself. Why the battle between the two, I don't know? I'm not good at this life, sure I can appear to be on facebook, anyone can. There was no lodging available for them, they worked with what they had, and God honored it and provided, I have to take what I am and who I am, and how I feel about me, and go with it. because that's what He wants from me, just as He makes Himself real to me in His own way, and that's really cool.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Comments?